Tesh's 18 mos. post op check up :)

.... AND I'm officially in my third trimester, that puts me at 28 weeks today! Woohoo.. so far so good. I have an ultra sound around the corner that'll hopefully ensure no cranio for this one! And we got to check on that placenta, which I'm optimistic about. :) Anywho,

Tesh: She turned 2 in October and her post op appt. (being 18 mos. post op) was yesterday.
      As we were driving out of town, it was so foggy, actually, it was foggy the whole day, but sitting in a car, the fog was ever present. I was taken back for a moment to the time when we drove away from the Cavanaugh house after Dad died when I was 16. It was foggy, much like this. As we coasted along the interstate, we saw these circular set of lights in the sky... We all gazed at them in question as to what they were. As we drew closer, we realized they were new street lights. :) We all had to laugh about it, even though it had been only hours after I gazed upon my Dad's lifeless body. That moment is etched in my memory, so as we drive past all those circular set of lights in the fog, I can't help myself but to be drawn back to the fresh air of the "new normal".
      I was very optimistic about this appt...... for once! I knew that Tesh was healthy, and that her head had been doing so well, so far, that why would it go wrong now? right? I tried to hold tight to this logic, going against my nature of pessimism.
We arrived to the hospital, ...late, of course.... and went straight to the Xray appt. first. I was saddened at the reality that I couldn't go with Tesh inside the xray room, for obvious pregnant reasons, so I had to keep her in her father's arms. Which I think she kind of preferred, since she's been attached to him lately... .. trader... :) I could hear her screaming, as I knew they were strapping her down, and... if you know Tesh.... you know that's a big "no no". She really doesn't like being here.

not happy :( Her lip is out and everything.

We got to the NS's office. Dr. M felt her head, and sat in silence.... for what seemed like forever, but it was probably about 20 seconds, in reality. Of course, this is plenty of time for me to think of a million questions, "what is he thinking?" " what is he gonna say to me?" "is he trying to find words to let me down gently?" "is it that bad?" "is it not that bad and he's not wanting to freak me out?" "He's freaking me out!" "SAY SOMETHING!!"
   Then he starts talking, with a smirk on his face. He explains that she'll always have these "soft spots", we don't need to be worried about her playing with having those soft spots, and he'll see us back in 2 years. What?! All that silence for that?.... well, I guess I'll take it. The weight melted off quickly as I realized what he was saying. I had to hear it still though, I asked, "So the xrays look good then?" He replies with a smile" Yes, they look very good. She is doing very well, especially for being only 18 mos. post op." Phew!!! What a relief, not only is she doing well, but better than well. I'll take that too!!

See the grey in the middle of the top of her skull? That's the "gel" bone still, not fused bone :)

Here's her lumpy profile. Forever lumpy... :)

 Then he starts small talk, which I thought was weird. Of all of a sudden, he's asking Isaiah where he's taking daddy to lunch. What neurosurgeon has time to have small talk like this? He must be having a good day himself... later it made us wonder if he sat in silence like that just to get a bit of a rise out of us, since it was such good news... you gotta think, that's probably the most entertainment he gets out of his job, since it's normally so serious. :)

University of Iowa Hospital Skywalk

     We left, Josh and I looking at eachother in relief, giving high fives....(yes, we do that still) and enjoying the rest of the day, knowing that at this moment everyone in our family is safe. ..... safe. What a wonderful feeling. One of those "heaven" moments. .....safe. No worries, enjoying life to it's fullest.... safe.

    





Of course, we stopped at Huhot.... Did you know there's a Huhot in Iowa City? We do!! It's on my top favorite restaurants list.

Isaiah took this picture. Me and Eve.

Eve, actually, took this one. She did very well!

Sisters lovin on eachother!

All of them lovin on eachother. This captures them perfectly.

Me and Eve being serious. Isaiah and Tesh being goofy.

Ok, fine! Let's all by goofy!!

Then, we stopped in the Amana's, which we love to do. Our normal places at the "The Chocolate Haus" and the wineries, trying different wines, and/or buying cheese and crackers.
       All in all, it was a great long day with great family time. The kids were really good during the whole thing. Yes, we cart all our kids around when we go to appt.s. It's actually really good for them. They like coming along and Isaiah learns so much and asks all these questions, stealing the hearts of every nurse he comes across. :)

If you've been following my blog at all, I'm sure you've read the stress around us. The family I talked about last post is still breathing through their "new normal".

Also, a very close friend of mine, recently had a miscarriage, that broke my heart. This was the very woman that fell to my feet when we lost Sarah, and now, I was holding her. It was her moment of brokenness and at first, she didn't want me around because of my belly (which I couldn't blame her although it broke my heart not to be able to be there for her) , but later, she allowed me to be there with her, she knew I loved her and that I knew her pain. She, too, is breathing....

This Saturday, December 17th, is Sarah's 5th "Angel Day". Missing her will never subside. 

I count my blessings. Oh, Lord, I count the blessings. Embracing Your plan can be so hard sometimes, but I am thankful for moments of Your peace and calm....
.....so for the Wings this Christmas, I am reminded that we are safe....