Thou Shalt Be Healed...or Not... whatever.....

My dad and I :) 

Hunched forward in pain, a man I've known as far back as I can remember, moves one step at a time. He humbly admits, "I really think I only have 6 months left. I hope this isn't a reflection on my faith." 

~
Miraculous healing is hard to hear for someone who's been in my shoes. Sure, the bullets could have stopped when my cousin pulled the trigger. The cancer could have dissipated before it took my dad's life. Or better yet, we could have caught it in time to avoid the suffering. My daughter could have started breathing finally after all my desperate pleading. The rope could have torn. The car could have stopped.

But alas, these things didn't happen. Everyone has to die someday. It's just the facts. I have faith. But my faith did not cure the situations mentioned.

I believe in miracles.
But I also believe in claiming miracles wherever I see them. Claiming to the world that all you have to do is believe, a miracle WILL happen, you WILL be healed and live, has it's different interpretations.

Some interpret this to mean very literally, that your life will be spared on this earth if you believe (enough).

Yep. I snuck in that word, enough, because that's pretty much what they are saying.

Then there's my personal interpretation: I believe that miracles are performed everyday by God, and sometimes, we get to be a part of that. I also believe it's our faith that re-frames our eyes to see the miracles. Whether they be miracles of physical healing or heart healing (eternal healing).

To me, there's a big difference between physical and heart healing.

Physical healing is obvious. The cancer is gone! You've made a full recovery from your car accident! You can walk!

There was once a girl in our youth group, in a wheel chair, and her only way of communicating was through typing on her small device. She was the sweetest. I sat next to her and the leader told us to talk about miracles and what kind of miracles there are. So I turned to her and asked her that question. She slowly typed the words, "Do you ever think God could make me walk?" I didn't know how to answer her. At that point, my dad (who was strong in his faith) died of cancer a few years back, and frankly, I became bitter with "miracles". I knew they happened, but not to me. So I responded to this girl who locked her eyes on me the best she could, "Maybe some day. You never know." I forced a smile, but wanted to hang my head low.

Years passed and I sat at a graduation ceremony. The names were endlessly called and I began to drown it out. But then, out of nowhere, the crowd started roaring! The role calling had ceased for this moment, and there she was. With walker in hand, that precious girl from youth group, walking across that stage and took her own diploma. I get teary just thinking about it.

The heart healing goes so much deeper. This is where "the Body" really comes into play in my life. I've seen miracles, but I've also seen suffering and death. This kind of healing is life long. People are put into your life that give you Jesus' love. It's those moments when things didn't go your way, but they turned out to be a blessing. It's the times when you meet someone and they share with you a story that was so encouraging to you, and now you can walk more confident that you are, indeed, loved. It's those times when that woman who was abused and dehumanized, realizes that she is so very precious. It's when a piece of heaven is brought to earth and the Body coming together as it should. That's a miracle.

And God knows I can't wait to find that ultimate healing that comes in the end. As Marcus Mumford wrote in his song,
"And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears.
And love will not break your heart, but release your fears.
Get over your hill and see what you find there
with Grace in your heart and flowers in your hair."

Open your eyes to the miracles all around you. Embrace the now. Love on each other.
~
When I heard that once strong man say those words, I responded, "When Dad got sick, we prayed for 2 things: That he be healed. And that we would be prepared for the journey ahead. Our prayers were answered."
~
My dad is now healed as he sits in paradise. And we are still standing on our crippled legs. It's not a matter of having enough faith to be healed. It's a matter of having the faith that opens your eyes and reaches you further passed the physical healing into the heart healing. Both are real. Neither should be used against anyone, judging them on their own faith. Don't be defeated by any absence of physical healing, when heart healing is always happening.

Recovering From Nightmares

Isaiah kissing Sarah.

After writing that last blog post, I have been receiving so many wonderful messages from people in response. People from all walks of life, encouraging me by sending their love and prayers. Some of you are walking with me in the very grief of our little Sarah. Some walk with their own grief of their own precious loved one. Some walk beside us, not having been through this experience themselves, but ever still remain faithful in love. Some having watched us as we went through losing Sarah and some new friends that just love on us, hearing of the trials we've gone through.

I just wanted to take a moment to say Thank you! Truly. Your love keeps bringing hopeful tears to my eyes. Hearing from certain people (having known us from the time of losing Sarah), once again, I'm taken back to those raw moments. But these moments aren't ones that ache so much, they are memories of simply being held by God.

If I left you with saying that I'm being reminded of "simply being held by God." I feel I would be doing a dis-service to you.... because I desire for you to understand what I mean by this.

All our family, our church family supported us so well when we were going through this traumatic experience. We were "held by God" by being served by "the body". That's ALL who have helped us in any way. Whether it was one thing that you did or many. ..

My husband and his dad during one of Sarah's birthdays.

I remember food being given to us. People coming to me just to lay beside me as I wouldn't move from my spot. People talking and being with my husband. I remember people taking care of our 2 year old. Pastors opening up their buildings to us for services, for prayer, for fellowship, for counseling. People coming to us just to stand in front of us, all to say, "I don't know what to say to you." People crying with us. A woman giving me cabbage for my drying milk in consequence of my baby being gone. Sarah's doctor encouraging us. I remember 6 months down the road being asked "How ARE you doing?" The hugs. The gifts. The cards. The little kids that were drawing me pictures of our whole family and writing me precious messages. The prayers. The space for grieving.

Grandma Lyn with Isaiah

Me and Samuel, my little buddy that helped me heal allowing me to hold another baby again.

Whether you did one or many of these things.... we felt God's hand upon us. We knew, by your love, that we had not been abandoned. You were the Body of Christ that well for us. Not all of you are from the same church building, but all of you banded together for the same cause, as the Body, to show love to a family that needed lifted. It brings tears to my eyes, even now as I write this, remembering those precious moments, because of what you did for us, that we were able to have those intimate moments with our King.




Today, as I have been receiving all your responses to this difficult time for us today, I am remembering the God, whom we serve, and why we serve Him. Your love, which can only truly come from Him, (whether you believe or not) gives me the hope that's going to get me through.



With all my heart, Thank you. May God bless you as you have blessed me.

Claiming Church and Miracles~

I wanted to give an update about my Uncle and how he's doing.

He is doing great!

By the grace and mercy and healing of God, he is doing well.

The doctors took several different tests as he sat in the ICU (for 3 days), and they all would come back negative with nothing wrong.

The nurses told him that patients aren't ever able to just walk out of the ICU to go home. ... and he did.

My uncle nearly lost his life a couple times that Saturday day. He wasn't able to stay conscious. He would stop breathing. His body temperature got very low. He was hardly able to walk when he was conscious.

I was preparing to lose him that day. and I didn't.

How?

Uncle's words exactly: "God is so good. Praise God I was healed. My faith has grown more than I thought it could. Praise Jesus."


A few months ago, some friends and I were doing a study on Acts and it would talk about healings, and we would be slightly stumped. We knew it was true, but we wondered why we didn't really see it today. Was it our unbelief?

I, personally, have watched so many of my close loved ones die. People that did believe in miracles, but God must have had different plans for them. After all, my father being one of them, died well, making an even bigger proclamation of God's existence and His power, even in the face of death. However, talking about miracles was a bit of a sore subject for me, having lost my father and then my daughter.

" a time to give birth and time to die." (Ecclesiastes 3)

I am claiming this miracle with my Uncle. There were so many witnesses to this, that you can't deny it. People saw him when he was apparently dying. People saw him in transition. People see him now, living to tell to the tale.

The very people that first found him, face down on the ground, also witnessed him standing at their door, just days later;  living, breathing, saying "thank you" for their love, prayers, and service.

There were so many people involved from different places. Different denominations. Different church buildings. Different families. Different upbringings. Different towns. Different living situations. with their own different gifts, with their own different weaknesses.

Those differences are exactly my point. When those differences collide into one mind, into one prayer, into one praise.... true church happens.

I feel so blessed to have been able to witness this, and, the truth be told, I witness it every single time the dread of a trial comes to our family. Because what happens is; one mind, one prayer, one praise.

Acts 2:46-47a "And day by day continuing with one mind in the temple, and breaking bread from house to house, they were taking their meals together with gladness and sincerity of heart, praising God, and having favor with all the people."

True church, people.

Not only did Uncle receive healing physically, but he is being healed emotionally. As well as others, like myself, that are receiving healing from this event. Sorry, you had to take the bullet Uncle.... but thank you :)



May you find the true church whenever your family and friends are together, in the name of Jesus. May you find the love of Jesus, in the arms of people that love you, in the service of people that are sincere, in the little hands that reach to you to pick them up, in the "voices of old" teaching wisdom, in the laughter of gladness and silly-ness, all the way to the tears of pain and grief. May you open your eyes to the church that is living and breathing around you, day after day.

Praise be to God!